Rabbi Israel ben Heman's Christian Nation Blog. 1 Samuel 29:1-7. Pure Reconciliation.

(1) Then the Philistines gathered together all their armies at Aphek, and the Israelites encamped by a fountain which is in Jezreel. (2) And the lords of the Philistines passed in review by hundreds and by thousands, but David and his men passed in review at the rear with Achish. (3) Then the princes of the Philistines said, 'What are these Hebrews doing here?'And Achish said to the princes of the Philistines, 'Is this not David, the servant of Saul king of Israel, who has been with me these days, or these years? And to this day I have found no fault in him since he defected to me.' (4) But the princes of the Philistines were angry with him; so the princes of the Philistines said to him, 'Make this fellow return, that he may go back to the place which you have appointed for him, and do not let him go down with us to battle, lest in the battle he become our adversary. For with what could he reconcile himself to his master, if not with the heads of these men? (5) Is this not David, of whom they sang to one another in dances, saying:
'Saul has slain his thousands,
And David his ten thousands'?' (6) Then Achish called David and said to him, 'Surely, as the LORD lives, you have been upright, and your going out and your coming in with me in the army is good in my sight. For to this day I have not found evil in you since the day of your coming to me. Nevertheless the lords do not favor you. (7) Therefore return now, and go in peace, that you may not displease the lords of the Philistines.'

In verse 4, the word "reconcile" is ratsah, meaning "to be pleased with, to accept, to favor, to satisfy." The Philistine princes themselves specified what David would have to do to be acceptable to Saul, to regain his favor: He would have to change sides in the middle of the battle. Once he did that, he and his men could slay a large number of the Philistines in a kind of sacrifice to Saul—to show Saul that he, David, was on his side and therefore should be accepted.So, David would have to make a sacrifice. He would 1) have to turn traitor, 2) have to slay a lot of Philistines, and 3) have to put his own life on the line. In reality, if he would have done this, he would have made himself unacceptable to either side! He would have sacrificed just about everything. This was one reconciliation that David did not want to do! Even though he argued a little bit with Achish to reinforce his cover, saying, "I don't want to return. I want to stay here with you," he and his men went back to the land of the Philistines and did not fight in that battle.Even in a case like this, some sort of sacrifice would have to be made to bring about reconciliation. 

Sometimes the sacrifice that is made has consequences itself. We have to make sure that the sacrifice that we make to reconcile with another will not put us into deeper water with God. So when we consider reconciliation, we must think deeply about it; it is not something we should do carelessly or automatically. We must really take the matter to heart to understand fully what we are doing. We have to try to predict what will happen as a result, so that it does not cause greater problems down the road. Reconciliation is not an easy subject and often not easy to do.